Alrighty, folks. Welcome back to our next episode of SDYT that a cast.

 

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I'm really glad you guys stopped by. So let's cover our next episode. Alrighty folks. Welcome back to SDYT, the podcast I'm your host. I'm Porter, and this is our first week of March 20 22.

 

So we've covered 2 months now of our theme for 20 22 being character of your character. March is a bit different with our core values, though. What we're going to cover is growth, confidence, and compassion.

 

So there's some element of each 1 of our interviews this week or this month, rather, that's gonna be covering those values. And then maybe some additional. So This particular episode, I'm pretty excited to get into.

 

I haven't talked to our guest in over a decade. We actually met in high school, but we'll get more into that. For the time being, if you're a new listener, welcome to the podcast, if you're a returning listener.

 

Welcome back, guys. Let's sit back for a second. Enjoy the conversation, and we'll jump in. So with that, again, guys, I'm Porter. I'm your host, and this is SDYT the podcast.

 

Alrighty, folks. Welcome back to this next episode of SDYT, the podcast. We're talking growth, confidence, and compassion, guys, real talk, different perspectives, shared values. This is gonna be a lot of fun.

 

So like I said, our next guest I haven't talked to in probably 12, maybe more years. I don't remember exactly. But now, since high school, he's he's become a firefighter. He's into all sorts of medical stuff.

 

He's a father. Brother, son, pastor's kid, like, this is this is wild. So we got a lot of stuff to talk about. With that, guys, Ben Green. Welcome to the podcast. Ben, what's up, brother? Good. I mean, how's it going?

 

Pretty good. Keeping busy, I guess. Keeping busy. Yeah. Likewise. Yeah. So let's let's get this out of the way first, I guess. So so Ben and I went to high school in and I don't even remember. When I I think I met you in 2000.

 

If I remember right. I mean, probably, like, 99 2000 on mistake because it was, like, maybe around, either the last year of middle school or freshman year. Yeah. Yeah. I guess it would be somewhere around there.

 

So wow. So that's a long time. Okay. So then, yeah, we graduated no 5. And I don't think I've really seen you since maybe, like, o 07:08. Yeah. That's probably I would say probably around this time, the Yeah.

 

Yeah. Probably. That's wild. And it sounds about right. Yeah. So this is This is small town, Florida. You're you're dead. Okay. So the high school let me just set the stage here. I'm calling this a high school.

 

Alright? But this is 1 floor of 1 building. Okay? That's the high school. If you're playing the home game, I think we graduated in like a 7 way tie out of 14 for GPA and highest graduate GPA. So that that's the high school.

 

Right? But so your dad was pastor of this attributed church. Right? At the time, Liberty Christian Academy, and in Florida. Right? But he was like the head pastor. Right? Yeah. So I would say we were there for about 17 years.

 

We moved up from Miami. My dad was offered the pastor spot there. He was previously a youth pastor in Miami. And I'm at Westwood Christian, and then he was the principal at Westwood High School in Miami.

 

Around the West Kendall area, and we moved from there to Lake County for the huge culture shock. Yeah. So yeah. And then he was there in the past of there for almost 20 years.

 

And when he started out, he was kind of like the associated he did pastor, and then he was also the principal of the school for about 10 years just just managing both jobs until he did kinda so the growth came from the school.

 

I mean, originally, I think we were there. There was, like, 80 high school students when we graduated. There were somewhere around, like, 200 in high school and I think 5 or 600 in total enrollment for for the school.

 

So -- Jeez. -- a lot of changes Right. Yeah. That's wild. And so I guess what what we're talking about, I suppose growth and confidence, this culture shock going from Miami.

 

Okay? Lake County at the time is not Lake County now. No. Not at all. Lake County at the time was more cows than people, but a few more antiques than cows. And Sure.

 

Yeah. But not anymore, man, now you've got like property values at 250000 or 50 k per acre, like, it's it's a totally different area now. So yeah. Very different. So then at the time, I guess, they take a couple minutes, ma'am.

 

Walk me through. What's it like being a little kid? I assumed somewhere around not a little kid, I guess, but early teens, at the time, growing up in Miami, and then moving to a stop.

 

In Miami, we moved here around, like, 6. Okay. So I mean, it was different. It it really I really only have good memories from there. And I'm still in touch with a lot of people that, you know, knew me as a little kid.

 

It was actually funny because after my dad came up here, get quite a few of his the youth that were in, like his youth group when he was there and and and use youth pastor actually come up and were, like, a youth pastor or on staff at Liberty for a while.

 

Oh, wow. They moved on to they pass with their own searches and and do the things they decided to do.

 

That's crazy. So, yeah, it was it was nice though. I mean, you know, and I'm still in touch with a lot today too. So it's, you know, it's cool. Yeah, small world though.

 

That's really neat. You can make that sort of a connection between people. I've got a buddy who graduated college with. He runs a company in Miami now. Called FAB Sports. I think is a subsidiary that he's got anyways.

 

But basically, they take a lot of these kids that they just wanna play basketball, essentially. They donate UK uniforms donated or whatever, and then his wife helps tutor them through school.

 

And if their grades are high enough, he lets them play on the court and gives them court time in a local basketball court there in the neighborhood.

 

Very cool. Yeah, man. It's It is. It's it's super cool. Like, despite everybody's different backgrounds and opinions, like, there's always something you can find to bring people together, you know, even at a high school, Yeah.

 

Absolutely. Yeah. I imagine your dad had all sorts of challenges he had to push through, but in in fairness, suppose we're not really here to talk about your dad either. So that'll be that'll be another time and conversation.

 

But but okay. So Pastor son, there's a lot of stereotypes there. Right? Pastor's kid in general, really. But Yeah. Most of them are Yeah. Alright. Alright. Well, let's let's break the mold a little bit. Right?

 

What's it like, I guess? Let's just start at the bottom. What what's it like being a pastor's kid? The influences, the the overwhelming amounts of positivity and religion in the home, you know? Or was this like you didn't really notice?

 

It just was what it was. Like, what what's it like? I I mean, I I guess I could suppose it would be like for anybody's anybody else's family who was in some type of, like, I guess, notable I don't wanna have a notable career.

 

You don't really know. While you're growing up, you know, it's kind of just you don't know anything else.

 

It's just that's what it is, you know. Yeah. You know, went to church every Sunday, every Sunday morning, every Sunday night, every Wednesday, of course, we're involved in everything. Yeah.

 

I think a lot of the stuff people don't don't really know and understand is, like, the Saturday mornings with your dad tracks you out of bed to, you know, mow the lawn at the church because wants to make sure that, you know, the grass looks good or the parking areas load up.

 

And, you know, things like confining me even in high school taking up the trash in the lunch room because I'm free labor, man.

 

That's that's how it is. Yeah. You know, sometimes they came with a little bit of I don't wanna say, like, extra privileges, you know, sometimes being around there because I did so much for other people there.

 

But a lot of times too, man, especially as a little kid, so growing up to be about even through high school, I would say probably until we were about a junior's or seniors, there was a lot of scrutiny there.

 

You know, whereas, you know, we could be in class and somebody do something or whatever, and they're like, you know, hey, man.

 

Stop. We're not supposed to be doing that and whatever. But then when your dad's around walking out the hallway, hey, I know you know your son was class doing this and, you know, everybody immediately goes to him.

 

Yeah. So I'd say, you know, it's always the parent teacher conference every day. You know? Yeah. Eventually, I think my dad had to stop because he wasn't gonna hear to the end of it.

 

And, you know, at a certain point, I just really frankly, just didn't give it give a damn anymore. Yeah. Of course. I don't know if I can say that on your podcast. But, yeah, you know, he really he really was just playing a game yet.

 

You gotta stop doing this and told him I was like, hey, you know, I remember we had a conversation. I think when I was a senior, and we all used to get out or You know?

 

Has bad news. We off we added the block schedule, and then they did the last schedule as, like, the straight schedule. And I remember specific incidents was kinda funny actually. It's that we were, like, I think you were in the picture.

 

It was like Chantelle. Britney and a couple of us around taking a picture. And I it might have been sawed too, but I was, like, sticking my finger. Like, after I go sticking my finger of some nose.

 

And 1 of the teachers who doesn't work there anymore said that I was flicking the flicking a bird or something to the camera, you know. And, you know, I have different people on the nose, Christian school, a private school.

 

So, you know, that's like -- Yeah. -- you know, the sign of the devil or something. Doesn't say anything to me, doesn't say anything to anybody else.

 

I'm, like, upstairs. Remember we used to play pool? Yeah. Yeah. We ran upstairs. Where, like, upstairs in the youth room, my phone rings, like, 10 times my mom, and mister Curtis. Yeah. Her her all all people have to judge somebody.

 

We will go to that. Yeah. Yeah. I remember they called me because I was getting suspended. And I was like, what do you mean? I'm getting suspended. For what? Like, Agans are suspended. You're flipping the bird in a picture.

 

And, you know, so and so wrote you up, and that's you know, you're gonna be suspended for 3 days. And I remember it was what's what's Britney's last name? It's claffy now, but Daniel. What? Daniels. What was it?

 

Daniel, Britney Daniels, she had to drive back to school. To show the picture on her camera that I wasn't doing it so that I didn't get suspended. I'm like, Well, they haven't really went through this much trouble for anybody else.

 

Yeah. Probably So, like, you know, those are the things that I encountered a lot of people know about and I I would never say my back is it's more embarrassing than anything.

 

Now I just laugh about it because if that was, like, the biggest thing going on at school now that nobody would even blink an eye to it. No. No. Now things are definitely different, man.

 

A lot of issues. I mean, there's frankly, even at the time, there probably wasn't much of a comparison between Liberty and the rest of the country's high schools. But No. But even still, man, I I didn't even know that till now, frankly.

 

But Yeah. Yeah. I mean, stuff like that would happen. I wouldn't say every week, but, like, every couple of weeks, it was always there was always something that got brought up in my house.

 

Yeah. And, honestly, I mean, you knew me in high school. There was a lot of the I don't give a fuck. Attitude because, like, if it's, you know, this it's just another Tuesday for me -- Yes.

 

-- because this is a stuff that I have. So I just kinda like you home a 2 month thing. It's not gonna change. So I might as well just just roll with it.

 

Yeah. But Yeah. So we had we had some similar I don't know. Strange of these, I guess. I don't even know if that's a word. But but but we had some similar things. Right? So, like, yeah, we we moved up there.

 

I guess, around that time, late nineties 2000 something or other. But but we came from all of our schooling was a Roman Catholic school. And so once we got up there, even the textbooks were different.

 

Like, things that we had learned And this and I'm bringing this up because this is obviously like a CRT consideration now and all, like, oh, books are gonna change and what maybe, man.

 

But, like, books have changed. That's just how it goes. You gotta explain things differently to different generations. Books change. Well, so anyway, we moved up here to the school. And even some of our textbooks were different.

 

You know, we're talking about pilgrims or Anglo Saxons or Catholic Faith, whatever. They were it was just always sort of a religious inject. Into some books just because it was a curriculum. Sure.

 

But I remember at 1 point I was sitting down at lunch, which in the cafeteria, I I don't know if I'm remembering this right or not, but in the cafeteria, I think I was sitting on like a picnic bench, style bench, or something like it.

 

Maybe I was outside the cafeteria. But either way, I was reading Harry Potter. And 1 of the books, whichever it was is irrelevant, I was reading Harry Potter, and I remember 1 of the teachers came next to me.

 

He who shall not be named, and he said, What are you reading? I showed him to cover the book, you know, like, I'm just reading a book.

 

I got some time, you know. And he he had I remember he had a red polo shirt on, tucked into his khakis, and then he leaned over, but like he crossed 1 leg over the other.

 

Not like you rest your ankle on your knee, but, like, crossed 1 leg over the other as he was sitting there, leaned in towards me and he said yeah. And he said so You you think that's real? And I was like, why?

 

I I don't know. We'd only been there a couple months. You know? Like, we're still just the Catholic kids at the Baptist School. Like, it was just odd and adjustment, let alone high school. And And I said, I don't know.

 

I don't know. I don't put my faith in this, but it's an entertaining book. Yeah. You know? Like, I don't know what the I mean, you should ask them, hey, man. You in the movie's Jurassic Park because you think that's real for the end.

 

Come on. Yeah. But, yeah, it's it's funny, man. Because those things do happen, you know. Yeah. Yeah. And it it was kinda surreal in the moment because you don't expect it. But now Now, man, like you said, that's a blip on the radar.

 

Yeah. No. It's nothing, man. And we used to I used to I used to think and that stuff was so funny because, you know, a lot of times, until, like, I remember my dad used to go with us on on on high school trips.

 

You remember they used to go on high school trips to go with New York and stuff. And everybody thought that some of these teachers would like we're getting this like, influence from my dad.

 

Like, that's how he was. He was like, you know, you go through the video games and they're all, like, the mini bosses. And then, like, their boss is pastor Green and he's, like, this legalistic, like, don't you have a worldly haircut?

 

Women shouldn't wear pants. And then, like, everybody goes to the high school tips and they're like, he's probably the most chill guy even more than any of these teachers ever, like, making jokes -- Yeah.

 

-- hanging out, you know, staying up all night, telling telling people, you know, just whatever.

 

I I mean, it was it just it just cracks me up because just the way things were in. See, we you know, there was there was people there are people.

 

There are teachers there that, you know, if I wanted to if I wanted to read Harry Potter, my dad would love to hear your partner. He knows that, you know, I don't think, obviously, think Harry Potter's a real person.

 

You know what I mean? Yeah. But there's some people there that were like that with their kids. And I mean, you remember probably around I would say, Experian.

 

My dad employed a lot of people who liked it and believe in cutting their hair. Mhmm. Really didn't believe women should wear pants or anything like that in certain circumstances and, you know, that's that was just their beliefs.

 

The 1 thing I can say is, like, everybody was welcome. Oh, yeah. Yeah. There wasn't any, like, segregation or or discrimination or any of that.

 

Yeah. And a lot of things that people don't realize saying, you know, my dad married my mom and you, my mom's when they got married, she was the Valero of the Catholic.

 

Oh, really? The whole yeah. The whole other side of my family is married about. I'm Catholic still and my grandmother until the day she died, my uncles.

 

Yeah. I didn't know that real My grandfather. Yeah. I know. No. A lot of people do. No. My you know, my grandfather is a devout Roman Catholic. My grandmother is from What is considered Slovenia.

 

But, basically, the panhandle Italy, they met my grandfather and grandmother when he was fighting world war 2 there. Wow. So, I mean, needless to say there's no there's no You marry somebody outside of the college field.

 

You're pretty much gonna get this done by her family. But yeah. No. My my grandmother and grandfather met there, both about Roman Catholics. My mom grew up Roman Catholic getting literally converted after her and my dad got married.

 

Oh, wow. So No. I had no idea. Yeah. I mean so okay. Let me let me real there's that much difference in faith. I know this and what the podcast was about.

 

Yeah. It's whatever, man. It's a free form. But, you know, there there's there's so many different similarities, really, but there are obviously fundamental differences, which is why they're different.

 

Sure. But while we're talking about differences in religion and and things like that, that can obviously be sticky topic in in certain circles and and conversations. But, you know, it's It's interesting.

 

I had 2000 well, when was this? 2011, winter 2011. I was in Kabul, Afghanistan, and I just wanted some food. That was it. Like, we had just gotten back into the fob and we're trying to just whatever. It was snow on the ground.

 

It was absolutely cold. And I think it was somewhere around I don't know. Like, 6 or 800 meters to get to the cafeteria from over work. But we had to leave the fob to go on to a different base to get all our food.

 

So there was a group of us and we were walking out, you know, we have we had our our weapons and whatever. We're we're walking down the road as a point, and we're going over to get food.

 

And there's this kid Harun was his name. His dad owned a like a clothing rug type wears shop in the bazaar on that was conveniently now set up between the fob and the cafeteria. So as we would walk through there man.

 

Hey, gotta hustle. Right? That's what I'm saying. Right? You can't hate the players. So you know, and like I said, this is 2011, so this has taken 7 or 8 years. Like, it's a relatively deliberately established bazaar now at this point.

 

And there's people with goats, there's people with clothes, and carpets, and all sorts of stuff. Well, anyways, so his dad's older. I mean, like, visibly in his nineties, but physically, maybe like 35, you know?

 

Like, it's a harsh place. Yeah. And Yeah. But Herun is 13 or 14. Sorry. 14 at the time. And half my height but, like, your build and chiseled. Just a jacked little pitbull of a guy. Teenager. Mhmm. Yeah. Anyways, his dad is not.

 

His dad is, like I said, 60 years in the mountains and desert of Afghanistan, just weathered and rough. Anyway so he's selling these things, and his dad's standing there, you know, in his traditional Afghan clothes.

 

Herun is not. Harun is in a pair of pants, western style clothes, and he's just watching us walk by. Well, we had been there for, I don't know, a month, 6 weeks. We basically just got there. And so I picked them out.

 

As we were walking by, I was like, hey, guys. We need to, like, let's this dude been watching us for the last 3 days, man. I I don't know. Every we're paranoid about everything, everybody, every crowd, every single person.

 

Of course. I mean, that place is where all the stuff goes. Down, actually, you know, especially here in that time. Actually, before things got really bad around there again, and I was actually looking at it.

 

3 years ago, I almost took a contract job there at in Covable at the embassy. Oh, yeah. So Embassy Row was pretty legit. We went up and down the street a few times there. But he Yeah.

 

No. That place is that place is legit. It -- For sure. -- it it was super cool experience, but it was months of at least in my experience, mentally living on edge second guessing every decision. Right? Like, why is that new start there?

 

The credit for what what goes down there? Well, the I mean, maybe maybe not. Right? But the the the biggest thing that I learned from it, as as an experience despite whatever else occurred, was from Herun.

 

So this went on for a few more days, and every time we would walk to go get food, he and his dad would be standing outside.

 

1 day I waved. 1 day he waved back. And so as we were walking back after we got food, I brought him and his dad some food from the cafeteria.

 

And I told the guys, like, hey, I'll catch up with you. Just, you know, keep walking, whatever, man, drop his stuff off with these guys.

 

So I gave him some food. And over the next 5 months, maybe 4 or 5 months, I was able to take her into the gym on the fob, we were able to work out twice a week, almost consistently dedicated.

 

Twice a week, I got to a point in part because of Harun, with my conversational Dari, I didn't bring an interpreter anymore. So he his dad and I would have conversations.

 

His English got to the point where he didn't bring a friend who could speak better anymore. Enough. Right? Like, oh, this is too heavy. I need a spotter, but, you know, and he said his goal was to be a wrestler.

 

He wanted to wrestle in Madison Square Garden. That was it. It's all he wanted. Okay. Yeah. And I said, alright. But this kid, like I said, 13, 14 years old, repping out 03:15 on the flat bench like for a dozen 15 reps, no problem.

 

Like just going. And when I finally went and said to leave, this is what turned out to be final walk past the market in his dad shop.

 

His dad waved me down and called me in with his little grizzled, like, arthritic hand and waved me into the shop, you know?

 

The clock. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a little crow foot. And he waved me into the shop, and he said, basically, I really appreciate what you did for my son.

 

He doesn't have any friends. He's here working all the time. And, you know, basically, all we do is pray so nobody talks to us. Not a man.

 

Like, I didn't even occur to me, religion at all. But then getting back to the states, A room told me at 1 point, everybody talks and complains about coming here, but, like, we live here. It's just the routine. It just is what it is.

 

You know, it's not overly religious like you hear on the news in some most places. People just live in their life. Doing things and accounting for whatever challenges are there along the way, but it's just routine.

 

And and a lot of what you were just talking about, obviously, a different sort of parallel, but a lot of what you were just talking about, that's where my head was going, where, you know, you start to think all you hear about pastor, instantly, religion, religious household, khaki pants tucked in pull his shirt, and that's it.

 

Part your hair maybe. You know? Like, that's what but It's I don't know. You you don't really stop to think that okay.

 

Well, religion is a way people see and think and view the world and give each other hope and help each other, but it doesn't necessarily always define people's character. Like, they're still just people. You know? Correct.

 

Correct. And I think a lot of that gets misunderstood. A lot of places around the world, even domestic now though, and it doesn't have to be a religious connotation, but like, you know, skin color, academic level, age bracket, whatever.

 

It doesn't matter. Political leaning, especially more now, but, like, or at least stateside more now.

 

Yeah. But it's really easy to forget that even though there's all sorts of different topics and intricacies and commonalities, it's a lot easier to see this sort of seduction to pessimism and and divisiveness, I think.

 

Sure. Sure. Yeah. And I think I mean, there's there's there.

 

I mean, there is I'd be lying if I would if I didn't say that there's there are places like that and there are families like that, but she would like independent fundamental I can only speak on that by half.

 

And you know what? I don't care if anybody sees it. You know, I grew up my whole life. And if they got a problem with it, they can, you know Sure.

 

They can find it. They can find me. You know, my dad was part of the BBFI for a long time. You know, my name is Ben Green Green, like, the last name, like, the bell or so for anybody you guys wanna find me.

 

Let me see this NEI of me people there where they won't like it. But, I mean, you know, I did go, you know, for and I I felt like like I said, my dad was a, you know, just a regular guy.

 

You know, I mean, we weren't we weren't, you know, when he wasn't cracking beers for me on my 20 first birthday, you know, I mean, But he was just a regular guy.

 

I mean, he taught me how to play baseball. He taught me how to work, and taught me how to budget my money, you know, it wasn't he wasn't standing behind me while I read the bible, beating me upside the head, you know.

 

And it wasn't it wasn't like that. You know, I grew up you know, just like just regular regular kit, you know, my dad understood that I did things that worked you know, the most appropriate at times, and he just understood I was a kid.

 

Yeah. So, you know, I was when 1 of those things, but I know a lot of people don't have that opportunity.

 

And now I saw a lot of that once I once I did get older and then and I started to into those things. So Sure. Yeah. And it's it's strange kinda what you realize as you get older.

 

But you know what? Actually, before we get into all that, let's let's take a quick break. Take. We'll come back in a couple minutes. We'll get into a little bit about fatherhood, growing up, adolescence, things like this.

 

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Please visit patreon empowerment institute dot com for more information. Alrighty, folks. Welcome back to SDYT the podcast again on Porter. I'm your host for talking growth, confidence, and compassion with Ben Green.

 

Alright. Ben, 1 of the things that you brought up when we took that break, we were talking. I I didn't realize this. So if I misinterpret or quote your your title here. I'm a throw it out there and then we'll we'll hit it.

 

1 of the things we talked about before we took the break was understanding different perspectives, points of view, developing appreciation, and recognition of different things, but usually in hindsight as you get older.

 

And so I'm curious as a lieutenant paramedic field training officer. You have to be able to forecast and project that level of compassion and recognition and still focus on obviously saving some lives.

 

Like, how do you balance all this in your head? Because I'm sure sometimes you've got biases just like anybody else does. You know? You're worried for your safety in certain neighborhoods or who knows?

 

Whatever. But Like, how do you, you know how how do you be a a genuine human being with biases and assumptions, but still put all that aside negate discrimination, and just focus on being a compassionate human being and do your job.

 

How do you do this? What's it like? You know, it's it's kinda strange because a lot of that stuff turns off. I think you just, like you said, you have this, like, natural bias. You have that natural you know, that thought process.

 

It's just just like a basic entity. Yeah. But it's weird because, you know, I've been doing this now. June will be 15 years, I believe, for me. So it's like it's kind of AAA weird thing.

 

I think sometimes, I would say it's it's harder to turn off my work mentality at home than it is to turn off my home mentality at work. Mhmm. It becomes like almost like a secondary thought process.

 

And and, you know, I I don't wanna sound cold, but you have to look things look at things, you know, objectively. Sure. You know, especially with a lot of stuff out in the world, people don't realize what what things really are.

 

They just see what's on the new or, you know, I I had, you know, I had somebody who's who's our age who said who made a comment to me.

 

He was like, oh, you know, you ever see any dead bodies. And I'm like, yeah. You know, almost every day. And he was like, no way, because that would be in the newspaper.

 

And I'm like, do you think every time someone dies in the newspaper? Like, every single time. It's like a front page. And and, you know, and they were they were serious. And and that kinda blew me away.

 

But back to what we were talking about, you know. I I you know, I don't I don't I prefer to treat everybody just the exact same way. And and sometimes depending on what kind of situation I'm in, I get a little flack for it.

 

But, you know, like, a lot of people do appreciate that as well. When it comes to patients, everybody gets treated the exact same way. Sure. I would say probably the people that get me the most biased is our new people.

 

Because, you know, I don't trust them. They haven't been working under me. They you know, and they and I I personally to I push into the max every time I can't just to see what they're made out of -- Mhmm.

 

-- just so we can establish boundaries I wanna see how how, you know, far they can go, how, you know, confident they are in their skills, and you know, but, you know, I do understand, like, if they're new, that's where the compassion work is educated.

 

Like, you know, I remember I was new. So it's not just beating them up all day. And then, you know, just being like, oh, you're terrible. No. It's you beat them up all day. You make them do something so they can't get it wrong again.

 

And then you explain to them why you're doing it and how, you know, tips and tricks on how to do better or you know, or just, you know, just let them know, hey, you're doing these things good.

 

You know, and that a lot of times too because Eventually, they'll be in those spots where they're not gonna have that safety net anymore. Mhmm. And in for an example, I I had a guy. He had been working with us a while.

 

Not even that young. He's, like, 28 now, 28 or 29. He came to us when he's 23, but you swore he was 15 years old. Really? He couldn't he couldn't do anything. He was very immature. I mean, just it was just honestly, it was a joke.

 

And I was just like this guy should never work here. After I made lieutenant, there was kind of a lot of uncertainty on, like, where people are gonna get assigned, and I get assigned to this house.

 

That's, you know, an hour away from home. It's not a very busy house, but it's kinda crucial. A lot of the things that they bring to the table. Well, guess who is assigned to that house as well and is now assigned done me.

 

Yeah. And he notoriously didn't like because I would let him know when I was a when I was a firefighter, I would let him know, like, hey, man. Like, what you're doing is not good enough.

 

You know, and I would offer to help him out or whatever, show him what I mean, but he just didn't have any interest. He really didn't have any interest in you know, doing a job. So it was a that was a big struggle for me.

 

I was reading a couple of books about leadership from, like, you know, Jaka Willie. There's another guy out of Fort Lauderdale. He wrote a book. It's called fiction Firehouse, and about being the example.

 

And so I set out to be an example and help this guy with his growth. Because, you know, he really wasn't confident about about things, and I feel like a lot of times with your growth comes confidence.

 

But we worked it out. And then, actually, we were there for about a year and a half together 18 months since then. He went from being just a regular firefighter EMT no ambition, no classes, no anything in 18 months.

 

We got him all the certifications he needs to. He went to medical school. He just graduated from medical school, and he actually just tested and made the lieutenant process. Nice. So I was pretty proud of that.

 

I feel like it was a win win for myself and him. I think it was growth on my part trying to use, you know, me being my my leadership role and trying to use that to him. Influence somebody, which I felt good about.

 

But, you know, tremendous growth on his part has actually become a more confident person. I just you know, I hope that he sticks with it, things like that. But I know that's kinda fast forward to now.

 

But, you know, a lot of those things, I think, it comes to you through experiences in your life. Yeah. You know, not so much when you're really young because you're just still trying to figure things out yourself.

 

You're still just, like, growing anyway. Mhmm. But I think, like, if you have influential leadership throughout your life, just a no matter what it is.

 

I mean, I know that, you know, you guys were, like, dig into martial arts, you know, seeing, like, some of those things. Having that discipline for that and and being involved in that and seeing leaders there.

 

You know, I played a lot of sports. So I had a lot of coaches I had a lot of helpers. You know, my dad was a very good leader for us. He was pretty fair. And then, you know, just being around a lot of the state people, you know, he was.

 

So I think some of that helped me. Obviously, it's a completely different career path, completely different things such as in a little bit different rules when it comes to Yeah.

 

The things I do and stuff. So Well, yeah. I mean, it's not like you're an accountant or a bookkeeper, you know, some random Sure.

 

Consistent, I guess, office job. But but I think a lot of the principles are still the same. Yeah. I think to a certain degree, martial arts helped, and there's definitely in there.

 

Obviously, it's part of the whole point. But 1 of the things that stood out about what you were talking about is 1 being that growth is consistent. It doesn't really stop. It's an enduring thing.

 

But I think in harnessing whatever that potential is either for this other guy or you in your own process as 2 separate individuals, but in harnessing that potential, I think you have to recognize that there is potential, either in yourself or in somebody to teach it to you.

 

So almost inadvertently, you've gotta be vulnerable, but exhibit like, I'm willing to be vulnerable and exhibit mutual respect.

 

Period, you know, even if it's unsaid. Because, like, with this this kid or this guy, whatever, working with you, If he wasn't willing to take your guidance, then he probably didn't think you had much to offer.

 

And maybe he didn't for a while. But at some point, he changed his mind or you did, something did, you know, and he was willing to listen. And I think that's a huge point of growth for individuals.

 

Or kids even. Yeah. I think I mean, we had talked about it and and, honestly, he he had told me at 1 point. He's like, man, I see. He's like sometimes I really just don't know how you do it. And I was like, what are you talking about?

 

It's like, I see you here doing school full time. He goes, You're always working overtime. He's like you're because he was with me when I was training other paramedics that would come to the station.

 

He's like, you're sitting up with these guys that you know, midnight running over scenarios, helping them study for their next tests, getting them ready to prep out to test out with the doctor, He goes, and then at the same time, we're still in bed at 7, and you're coming in at 7 from doing an hour workout.

 

And then helping clean up to get ready to go the next morning, and then you're going to your other job, you go work, or you're, you know, you know, anything. He's like, when you're married, you have kids.

 

He's like, you know, I really didn't think I had time to do the things I wanted to do to grow. And, you know, when he when he opened his eyes and I was you know, we we brought up stupid examples.

 

I'm like, well, you know, they're getting a soccer, huge soccer kit originally from, like, actually, South South Africa. And I said, well, you know, I know you've been on these vacations.

 

Like, how how many vacations have you been on since you worked here to go follow soccer teams around the EU. While I went for, like, a month and a half to follow that. I said, there you go right there, man. Mhmm.

 

I said a month and a half will get you 4 classes. That you need 11 just 11 just to be able to apply for your certs and then, like, 5 more and then you could go be you could be a lieutenant after you test. I'm like, you could have that.

 

It was after explaining some of those dates, but him also, you know, seeing the example I was setting as you know, basically, someone who was walking the walk instead of just talking to talk which is a huge thing for me.

 

Yeah. I mean, I I'm sure it's I'm sure it's, you know, it's the same culture.

 

It's the same culture the military. Mhmm. You know, yeah, Gray did this in 2005. Cool. But are you still relevant now? Yeah. Exactly. If if the answer is no, you're not you're not still relevant now, then you're not still I'm sorry.

 

That's great what you did then. That's for now. But every day, you have to show that you're still relevant in the service. And I I hate to say it, like, in a way that some people might find offensive, but it is what it is.

 

The service that we do in in military or pill or paramilitary, especially when it comes to men. It's an alpha lifestyle period from the top down.

 

Just because you're an alpha does not mean you can't take construction or anything like that, it's it's being able to make that decision whether it's right or wrong is making that decision.

 

It's wrong, then you grow from it. If you're right, then you also grow from it, or you grow to the next decision.

 

Yeah. When when you stop when you lose that, That's when you stop growing, that's when everything ceases. And, I mean, I I guess you could say everything, you know, we always grow but in reality, it's we might not always grow up.

 

You know what I mean? You you know, those plants that are growing down to get their sun light, and they look horrible, but we need to be growing up.

 

And that's the that's the biggest thing for me, which also inspires the other things that we're talking about, you know, confidence, I think.

 

You know, you you know, to 10 years ago, you know, 15 years ago or whatever when you're coming out, like, for you, like, when you're coming out of college or whatever in your life.

 

You kinda know what you're gonna do, you don't know what you're gonna do.

 

Well, I didn't have a clue. Yeah. So now what you can so now you have a clear your path. Uh-huh. You know what the next step is for you to make and what you need to do of that.

 

Yeah. You have clear expectations of what you have right now and and, you know, you're you're in a position where you're not gonna be stagnant. Because it's either grow or go.

 

You know, I wish I wish my group feel was a little more like that because I I think we got a lot more people that are low hanging fruit that drag the tree down a little bit. But, you know, I and, you know, you gotta continue to grow.

 

Well, that's it, man. Like, it I I think it goes 2 different directions. Right? Like, if you don't have anything weighing you down, you're just a balloon, and that doesn't do anybody good either.

 

But, like, it's it's, I think, a balance. Because we've got a lot of guys that even in my community, but in military as a whole, the the saltier guys, you know, the guys that have paid their dues and turned white belts black.

 

Right? Like those guys, whether or not they're making an effort to teach people, but if they're not, Generally, and I'm making a big assumption here.

 

Generally, they're the loudest guys that walk the slowest and don't do much. You know, by the time they near the end of their careers at least. But they're tired or they don't quite have the same drive and perspective.

 

It's sort of been either baked and burnt out of them, and they just need to separate and move on. Or they've lost sight of it. And not that there's anything wrong with that. I think it's a natural progression, but but you're right, man.

 

I think that's part of I think experiencing that is part of growing up too. But if you don't experience it, being burnt out, being tired, not being short of a direction or whatever, and you're sort of force fed into that.

 

Shoot, I guess. It's tough to learn how to cope and build resiliency to that when you experience it later as an adult or get burnt out or stressed whatever other number of things that require solutions to that sort of internal conflict.

 

Yeah. I think it's established or with, you know, discipline.

 

Yeah. Early with discipline. Like and I just I'm wondering when people yeah. People hear discipline, you know, especially these days, they they think about, you know -- Beating your kids, though.

 

-- getting yeah. You getting whipped with a belt. No. The discipline is, like, III play back to sports or martial arts.

 

You know, if if you go to practice once a week, are you gonna be good? No. You're not. If you go to if go to martial arts and you're supposed to be doing it 3 times a week and you go once a week or once every other week.

 

Do you ever expect to graduate your belt or you're gonna get mad when somebody else has been going 4 days a week training -- Yeah. -- graduates there about before you. It doesn't matter. And it really it matters on you.

 

Getting to the salty dogs -- Mhmm. -- because we got a lot of those guys. A lot of those guys have reached the pinnacle of their career. That's as far as they're gonna go. They know that there's nowhere else for them to go.

 

So I think sometimes they get salty about that. I think a different emotion for too is to you know, they claim a misery. Ah, this place sucks. Oh, yeah. Or this is a dump. You know? It's always this is a dump. This place is a dump.

 

You because they know that it's about time for them to retire and then to separate, and that's a big part of their life. And it's not like gonna be coming back to base or coming back to the firehouse to drink coffee and shoot the shit.

 

Yep. I mean, and let's be honest, it is what it is. And, you know, when you work in these type of capacities together, basically, in the stuff, you grow with whoever you're with.

 

And those it sucks at the time, but it ends up being the best time that you ever talked about. Oh, yeah. You don't have the choice. The best time that you remember you just don't know that you're making that time.

 

You're as per sucks. Yeah. So we're just gonna do it because it sucks. Well, that's the thing about shared misery. Right? It just Yeah. Yeah. It it's inevitably inevitably gonna breed some semblance of comradery.

 

And but but that's but that's the thing too. Right? Like, you've got to be able to find ways especially at, like, at this point in our careers or or whatever else applies to any of our listeners as well to this conversation.

 

But you get to a certain point where It's not really in my opinion, an obligation to pay back as much as it is part of the drive in the routine and growth progression in mindset, that, like, you want to be able to share what you know to help other people grow and be better than you when they get to where you are.

 

You know? It's not like a necessity or an obligation. It's it's just part of the drive, I think, that comes with it.

 

Yeah. And I think, you know, a lot of times, see I think the thing that hurts me the most, honestly, recently. So we've had a lot of new recruits with us, and because we're we're expanding.

 

Our departments expanding tremendous time. And, you know, recently, I've been Ryan's here with Bruce. They they just don't care I got 3 months. They're, like, all of a sudden salty. And I'm just like, what do you have to be salty about?

 

Yeah. What are you doing? That's the greatest job ever. And if like you you have the opportunity. You're surrounded. Like, I mean, some of these people are surrounded by, like, some of the best guys.

 

Some of the best new guys and girls that they could be around, and they're so salty. I'm like, you don't understand this is like the tested kids right now.

 

You get all the fun without the responsibility, and you have so much potential to learn from these people that would love to pass that based on, and you can fast track your whole learning process.

 

That might take you 5 years and cut it by 3 years. Yeah. If you just paid attention.

 

And, you know, they're too hung up on things like why are you make me mop the floor, why you make me watch the truck by myself, why you make me check this office because, you know, why, it's because honestly, an emergency, it's you.

 

When when it comes down to emergency, no 1 else is coming.

 

It's you. People are calling you. So, you know, why you wash the truck is because then when you wash the truck by yourself, you're not talking to somebody else and you're familiar where everything is on that truck.

 

You know? Some of that stuff mopping, cleaning through that. That's just a ride to pass.

 

So you gotta pay your dues too. It shows but he also yeah. You you pay your dues and you Yeah. But these kids say, get out of school and they take paying their dues. That's that's the thing with the paying their dues.

 

I'm like, no, man. You keep this place clean. You keep yourself in shape, and you keep yourself mental New Sharp, you know, that shows me you wanna be here. Mhmm. So I'm not investing into somebody that doesn't wanna be here.

 

So when I see you had taken initiative, go to things that aren't even based on things that are what is expected of them. No problem. We'll match your model for anybody. That kinda goes into play with that guy.

 

I mean, he was just doing the baseline stuff. And he actually gave me 1 of these that's that's just someone said that everybody thinks he's a joke. And he was like, I I just wish people that I think was a joke.

 

And I was, Well, yeah, do something. Don't do the reason. Yeah. He literally just didn't have and and later I found out, you know, He's the youngest kid in his family. He was, like, surprised. Like, his dad is, like, He's 29.

 

His dad's, like, 70 something years old, you know, in his late seventies, which there's nothing wrong with that. But, like, I mean, his sister is, like, 10 years older than him in. And his brother is, like, 5 years older than sister.

 

Sure. And his brother's, like, a big time electrical engineer from, like, Lockheed Barneys, sister's orthopedic surgeon. And he was, like, before he became a firefighter, he's like a sub a 2 teacher.

 

Yeah. Sure. You know what I mean? So you see that you see that I forgot the window and and a lot of things. You know? That's, you know, that recognition of it might take till they're 20, May, 28, 29 years old to recognize that.

 

But, you know, the sooner you get to recognize people, the the best ways to pass on that which helps them grow and helps them be confident in in in what they're doing.

 

And that's really I mean, that's what we need just in society in general. Oh, yeah. We need growth. We need growth. You're seeing that the the age of people, you know, 19, 18, 19 years old, people are gonna go serve their country.

 

People are getting career fields or you know, they're getting ready to have families. I mean, people at 25 are just starting college because they don't know what to do. You know? Yeah.

 

1 of the differences and, you know, the differences they're they're having those adult burdens now. Uh-huh. You know, like like having kids. You know, having car payments and having, you know, bad credit scores and stuff like that.

 

And if that just doesn't, that doesn't help, you know, people grow. And and you wanna talk about a shot at confidence. When you can't go get, you know, your own place or you know, take care of your own things.

 

I mean, that's that's really what shoots you down. So Yeah. I definitely can. I don't know if it's exposure to that say as a teenager or as a kid, like here's how you balance a checkbook type on the same level.

 

But Right. But maybe. Right? Like here for example, here's how you balance a demanding schedule. As opposed to your parents doing, telling everything for you, and you don't realize that you are actually having to put in effort.

 

Right? Like, it looks like you said. If you don't grow and put in the effort and continue moving a direction, at least, you're gonna atrophy, and in whatever sense applies.

 

And I I think a lot of that same where we get a lot of call it atrophic high school graduates, you know, who are are sort of, like, I guess not as well equipped as they could be.

 

Now does that mean you've gotta teach classics? And Aristotle in high school, civics, I I don't know if that's the answer. But I think life skills, man, like, man, And that's what I mean.

 

Explaining it though, at least having conversations about it. You know, it's it's being able to communicate that breeds survival. And I think that's what it takes. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. A hundred percent.

 

Yeah. I agree. Before we get any further, let's take a quick break for a minute. We'll come back here with Ben Green. Again, I'm Porter. I'm your host for talking growth, confidence, and compassion on this to investYT the podcast.

 

Hey, everybody. This porter with SD YT the podcast. When we're talking about then in time with your family and even remembering loved ones, maybe when you can't be there.

 

I'd like to pass the mic for a second over to my buddy Dax, and he's gonna talk about the b and the bear creations. That's BEE and the BEAR.

 

Be in the bear creations. Dex? Hey, everyone. It's Stack's here. I just wanted to take a moment and give a shout out to my wife, Julie. She is a artist of sorts, but she has a Facebook page called the bee and the Bear creations.

 

And what that page is for is basically if you wanted to do a specialized item like a tumbler or a hat or a vinyl or a decal or a shirt, you can go there.

 

You can ask some questions, look through the WERE's, but then give a DM and try to sort it out and then work it adjust pricing.

 

But if you're interested something like that, go ahead, like her page is the be and the bear creations on Facebook.

 

So go enjoy. Alrighty, folks. Welcome back to SDYT the podcast. Again, I'm Porter. I'm your host. This episode, we're talking with Ben Green about growth, confidence, and compassion.

 

We talked about a lot of stuff. So if you miss the first 2 segments, feel free to rewind the podcast. Check it out. And if you're returning and you stayed with us the whole time, welcome back to this next segment.

 

Now 1 of the things we touched on, Ben, before in this second segment was you had mentioned there's an individual who you had worked with and then worked at the same firehouse with for about 18 months.

 

You said that, essentially, he had gone into this process, little comfortably low drive, low ambition, electrical engineer, older brother, executive, older sister, substitute teacher.

 

Orthopedic surgeon. Yeah. Orthopedic surgeon. Excuse me. I wrote that wrong man. But yeah.

 

And then substitute teacher and even if it were as a mentality and not actual job employment, I think that breeds an interesting point where it's sometimes beneficial to have competition with your siblings or with other people or in a team or with other teams.

 

Yeah. But if we're talking growth and confidence and compassion, From this perspective, I think competition with yourself is an underrated skill set too. How do you breed that competition? How do you break through that competition?

 

So let's talk Let's talk some role models. Let's talk some advice. Let's talk some fatherly wisdom now. About competition with yourself, man. How do you design it, develop it, overcome it, teach yourself lessons? What are your insights?

 

What are your thoughts? Cool. Yeah. That's deep. Well, you know, honestly, It's kinda strange. Initially, you know, growing up, I would say, like, around that high school age, Ira really had no idea what I want to do.

 

Uh-huh. You know, I play a lot of sports. There was a lot of comradery there. There's a lot of competition there, and that competition helps you step up.

 

Sure. I think, you know, everybody's built differently. But -- Yeah. -- you know, essentially, And then and not physically, not just physically, but mentally as well, you know.

 

Oh, yeah. Just striving the beats the best, whatever they wanna do, whether it's being the smartest, whether it's being the fastest, the strongest, whatever.

 

I think a lot of it started, you know, with competition And and for me, personally, I don't do a lot of comparing myself to anybody else as much.

 

A lot of times, it's what's best for me, what's best for my family. And and what I have to do to be there, Luckily enough, like I said, I'm in a very alpha male, alpha female type job.

 

To where we are always competing. But, you know, it's a knife that always stays sharp. So you know, there's not really a negative to it.

 

Sure. For me, personally, you know, I learned I picked from different resources you know, my dad was was pretty big on teaching me, like, just basic everyday, you know, mannerisms and and the way to talk to people -- Mhmm.

 

-- how to treat certain people, you know, Yeah.

 

Those things. And I I think that got me I don't wanna say it got me to where I'm at, but it got me to get to where I'm at. Oh, yeah. So those introductions for people and and learning from people.

 

And and to be honest, you know, I'm sure everybody's heard it. But if you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room. And, you know, I I kinda strive off a lot of that. As stupid as it sounds.

 

And it might be that you're smart and 9 things out of 10, and that 1 person is smart out of 1 thing out of 10, but it's the 1 thing that you're not smart in, then that means you're not the smartest person in the road.

 

So that's kind of where III pick some of my stuff up from.

 

Well, I think that's that's the thing about competition, man. You said you said comparison, and it it made me think there's a difference between just for the sake of clarity, there's a difference between comparison and competition.

 

And I think comparison is based on almost generally speaking, but almost an unrealistic or unfeasible, maybe even unattainable in some cases baseline because there has to be some sort of equity for there to be an even fair comparison.

 

And, like Yeah. I think III get where you're stand. For me, my comparison would be like when I refer to it in some of those aspects. If I see somebody who's, say, close to me, but I don't know level than I am.

 

Uh-huh. I'll look at that as, like, you know what, like, what can I do to get at that level? Because they're they're doing a little bit higher than me. Do I do that though? And that helps me compete -- I got it.

 

Perfect. -- and strive to do that. Sometimes people compare and it's they compare it in negative sense. But that's almost like complaining or whining. You know what I mean? Like, oh, well, they're so much better than me.

 

But it's like, through the you're still breathing so the clock has to stop Yeah. So you have, you know, rest of your life. But some people feel like once they get to a certain point of life, they just they don't grow anymore.

 

And I I feel like when you don't grow. That's when you just start withering away. Oh, yeah. I take I take classes on that. I'm actually you know, it's kinda fun like, we were talking about school literally.

 

Here's my computer. Oh, yeah. I'm literally writing a paper right now for school until taking school. And I'm 34 years old, and I'm taking college classes, teaching college classes.

 

And that just keeps me sharp. Yeah. And that me knowing that like, hey, that competition is not only just, you know, with I don't wanna say with other people, but it with myself because I'm here to be a better person every day.

 

Well, as long as you recognize it -- What's that?

 

-- I say as long as you recognize it. You have to because if you don't, then eventually you're like, what am I doing for? Yeah. If you don't recognize the growth if you don't recognize the change.

 

And and that is sometimes where comparison comes in because you see people who may have been in a similar position you were last year and then you see them and then you see the exponential growth that you put in that is showing now that separation between this person was kinda like how I was last year, and I'm where I'm at now.

 

So that doesn't say anything about them. They were in that same spot. So you've noticed that growth, and and that in itself is a reward and that in self inspires confidence.

 

Well, there's that. Because you have come. Yeah. Yeah. I agree. There's that. I don't mean to interrupt you again. I've been doing that lately.

 

But You're good. But there there's that with other people, but there's that with you too. Right? Like, you can compete with the better version of you and compare yourself to the poorer quality version of you.

 

You know, whether it's over years or a snapshot moment in time or decades or whatever, different events, but then then the baseline is you as an individual.

 

And so, especially now with social media, we see it on Instagram, more popularly, I guess, or social media in general. But, like, even on the news, man, people the haves and the have nots.

 

Well, I don't have because I don't care to have. You know? It doesn't necessarily matter as much. But but me, for what I do have, or my needs met, are my once taken care of?

 

Is my family or whatever priorities I've got taken care of? And was I able to do that a year ago? Yes or no? Well, if I can now, incremental progress is still growth. You know? Yeah.

 

And, you know, actually, me and my wife have that conversation quite often because we've gone through so much growth in probably the last 8 years. We've talked about just just a phenomenal growth that we you would have never thought of.

 

And it's kinda like, you know, the person you the person you were 10:15 years ago, like, for me, would be Dan Prouder who I am today So, like, for me, that's just a reason to keep going.

 

And, you know, another thing is just being able to measure out that both from the position we were in, myself and her, and the things we've been through, which know, most people would not go through and and 5 lifetimes.

 

Mhmm. And, you know, I mean, we've gone from you know, being married initially to and we had she already has some.

 

We actually we I adopted him. At 5, which was which was phenomenal, grace, they're gracing and what. And then we had a son of a road then, you know, at at 1 year old, we we noticed some things were going on with him.

 

And then at 2, he was diagnosed with autism. Oh, really? And, you know yeah. I know that not a lot of people know. It's on we're gonna broadcast it. But, you know, we've been really struggling with that.

 

Now he's 8. We've been really struggling with, you know, some of those things. And, you know, And 2 years ago, we had a daughter which was, like, a complete surprise to all her kids are 6 years apart in between all of them. Oh, wow.

 

Yeah. And it was something that we never thought would happen. And and for us, like, we talked about, you know, how when we first got together. I mean, gosh, we moved here. You know, we had 1 car we were living in a a duplex rental.

 

She was dropping me off at work at the station every day. She was coming to pick me up every day. She couldn't even work because, you know, we had the baby and all this stuff. It was it was a big struggle, and then from that.

 

So I remember, like, when we got back, and then I bought my first truck, so I could just drive back and forth to work. And, you know, that was and I mean, I I think our rep was, like, 800 dollars a month.

 

Yeah. And it was, like you know, I mean, we were, like, couponing and counting pennies. And now it's so funny because I'm, like, you know, now we got 3 kids.

 

Her mom lives in our guest house. We own a couple acres. You know, we both have our own muscle cars, and she's got this, you know, really nice jeep and I have a really nice truck.

 

You know, we we own a couple different properties, and I'm not bragging here, but it's just like I we worked for that together and supported each other and that.

 

So, like, for us to be able to look back at those things and say, like, yeah, we're definitely headed in the right direction.

 

Mhmm. That inspires us as well. And she's a huge inspiration to me, to be honest, because she gets down on herself instead of why.

 

But she's, you know, in times where I didn't wanna do anything. When I was done, she was just you know, she's kinda like, listen. I know you're better than that.

 

Let's get through this. Let's sacrifice for this or sacrifice for that. Yeah. Because we know in the long run, we're like, that's where it's gonna be. And, you know, up until recently, she's been staying at home with the kids.

 

She just got another job that she loves. Absolutely. So much. But, you know, it's it's through her sacrifice that I was able to focus a lot on my growth potential, which results in our our family's growth potential.

 

Sure. Yeah. And it's in email, all the things that we've been through has help us grow. And and actually just really it's it's kinda corny but it inspires confidence in our relationship together.

 

For us to have a really great relationship. Oh, yeah. You see what you're able to accomplish? Impressed about it. Oh, yeah. I don't blame you, man. That's awesome. Congratulations.

 

So yeah. Thanks, man. I really lucked out honestly. Yeah. Yeah. I really did. And it and it really came at a very unexpected time where I really was just kind of, like, I was ready to be done and just how we're just gonna be selfish.

 

And do whatever I wanted and, like, she just came Walton in and I mean, you can call it God, you can call it destiny, whatever anybody wants to call it. But it was definitely 1 of those meds to things.

 

So Yeah. It's strange how it works. But in the same vein, if you don't recognize it, you don't appreciate it. And that that recognition still, again, makes all the difference. Yeah. Yeah. But -- Absolutely. -- you know what?

 

With that, I understand you gotta get going. And so Yeah. I gotta get these chips. Yeah. Just kissing the back and all that stuff. Yeah. No worries, man. I really appreciate you making some time in your schedule for this opportunity.

 

For me, for our listeners, to hear things from your perspective, and and just sit down and talk and catch up for a little bit, man. So thank you. I appreciate it.

 

Absolutely, man. I'm glad to glad to use Miami on Yeah. Yeah, of course. And there's there's plenty other opportunities whenever you find 10 years from now that you have another opportunity to take an hour off, if you let me know.

 

And and we'll get it working, man. But until then, yeah, we'll stay in touch. I appreciate your your help and your insight and the conversation. Otherwise, to all our listeners, though, I appreciate you appreciate you guys tuning in.

 

Stay in touch. We've got more episodes booked throughout the rest of the year. For the time being, Ben Green. Thanks for your time. Listeners, I'm Porter. I'm your host, and that was SDYT the podcast.